An Update

Wow. I've not been so great at keeping this blog updated! Things have been busy, as most households with five people, a dog, and two lizards tend to be. Blogging is always in the back of my mind but I, obviously, rarely sit down and actually do it.

On a recent hike......love these three. Is Silas crossing his eyes? It just wouldn't be right if we got a normal pic with all three smiling normally.

Don't even ask. One day, this picture will come back to haunt them. I promise.

There is so much I wish I could write about right now. There are still changes in the works for our family, but we don't know yet what they will look like. We have been in a holding pattern for quite some time now and Jeff and I have grown weary of it. We have learned, however, to be proud of how far we've come. Thirteen years ago at the start of our marriage, there is no way we would have handled things as well as we are now. We have learned to not take things out on each other and to support the other when it's starting to get to them. We're certainly not perfect and often find ourselves asking the other for forgiveness. But, thanks be to God that we have come this far!

Why, yes, thank you for asking. Selah WAS Rapunzel this year. Doesn't her hair look so natural? (Thanks to Grandma for always making such amazing costumes for our kids!)

The kids are all well. Our little Selah is quite the star student. She has her first man teacher this year and adores him. Just this weekend, she wrote a four page story in perfect handwriting just for fun. She can often be found at the kitchen table or in her art room creating something out of sequins, feathers, buttons, and colors. I wish I was as creative and itched to create things like she does. But, I just don't seem to have that gift!

I adore this picture of two of my favorite boys!

Silas still melts our heart with his huge eyes and sweet disposition. He is kind and sensitive and a good friend to many. He is totally into archery and I love watching this boy in his talent. He began lessons over a year ago and is really quite gifted. He was very excited to learn there is an archery category in the olympics!

Sam and his super funky- cool new glasses. He looks more and more grown up to me.

I am having so much fun homeschooling Sam. Sam would not tell you that homeschooling is great- it's not really 'cool' to be homeschooled in the seventh grade. But, Jeff and I see him growing and maturing in so many ways and it's really neat to get to witness that first hand. He is a leader amongst the younger kids at our church, who all adore Sam. He has regular babysitting jobs in the neighborhood now, as he's become known as quite a responsible kid!

I got a haircut and I wish you could see in this pic- I got a purple streak in it! (That was my mid-life crisis thingie....I think.)

I have been diagnosed with Tourette's Syndrome. Before you ask, no, I don't randomly yell out obscenities, but I suppose I now have an excuse in case I DO. Some of you who know me know I have struggled with face and neck tics for years. For some reason (possible because of stress) they became really bad this year. I went to several doctors and was given a few different prescriptions which did not work and had severe side effects. I am now on a gluten-free (mostly Paleo) diet again, taking large amounts of fish oil and probiotics, and eating very little sugar. Physically, I feel great. The tics continue, but are a bit more manageable and I am hopeful they will subside even more as I continue to eat well and exercise regularly.

Jeff and his first motorcycle. He MIGHT have almost crashed his first time out of the garage.

Jeff bought a motorcycle and got his license to drive it. I am so happy and excited for him, as this is something he has talked about for years. I haven't ridden with him yet, but will once he's more experienced and comfortable with it. He looks pretty hot riding that thing and I can hardly wait to ride with him! I might even get my license, who knows.......

So, there you have it. A long, boring update. If you read to the end.....bless you. Thanks for caring about and loving our family. We are so blessed by the many dear friends we've made over the years.

My husband is the man.

Jeff planned a romantic picnic for my birthday- put together a beautiful meal with a gorgeous bottle of wine. We farmed the kids out (thank you, dear friends who took our children) and with the anticipation of a beautiful day in the mountains in our new (to us) truck with brand new tires....... We hit a snag. And, so, instead, Jeff and I had the privilege of experiencing our first time hitch hiking. It was not the day we had planned but we have never been so thankful for the kindness of strangers- namely, an extremely kind
military man named Casey.

A post for Amanda- the beginning of greatness

A New, Previously Attempted (but failed), Experiment

(I have a lot of pictures of the top of Sam's head. Apparently, it's very uncool to have your mom take your picture.)

Sam turned twelve over the summer- 12! He continues to impress Jeff and I with his deep thinking and the way he mentors the younger kids. He's not perfect, by any means, but when he is disrespectful or lashes out, he almost always recognizes it and apologizes.

We have decided to to try our hand at homeschooling again- with Sam only. He is entering seventh grade and, pretty much everyone I know had horrible seventh grade experiences. We are not trying to shelter him. In fact, I hope that by homeschooling we will be able to expose him to experiences that will open his eyes to this hurting world. I hope we will be able to inspire him to think outside of his sweet little middle school self and that he will recognize his need and the world's need for Jesus.

I am excited and scared and cautiously optimistic. My prayer journal is filled with words like, "Lord, have mercy." "Lord, give me wisdom." "Lord, have patience."

2012 has been filled with a lot of changes for our family. For a while now, Jeff and I have felt strongly there would be more changes. I can not write about them yet (just to torture you), but I can assure you that I am not pregnant and we are all healthy (except for Jeff who recently dislocated his shoulder and is seeing an orthopedist soon.)

For those of you who read this and are the prayer type, I do want you to know that we covet your prayers right now. Thank you for caring about our family. There are days when everything seems to be going awry but I read a sweet comment and it somehow makes everything all better. (This is not a subtle guilt trip to get you to write a sweet comment. Well, maybe it is. Subconsciously. Although, I guess now it's conscience. Oh dearest. I'm a quack,)

Hot White Mama

As I was tucking Selah in the other night I told her she was, "My beautiful Vietnamese princess." Without missing a beat she responded, "And you're my hot white mama." Typically, I try and discourage my children from describing people as hot, unless, I always say, you are describing your husband or wife. But, it was just so darn funny I didn't get after her.
The hot white mama and the beautiful Vietnamese princess are off to China on Friday- yes, China!! One of my best friends in the whole world happens to live there. That would be my sister, Amanda. (That was a trick. You can't actually see her blog unless you are really special.) And one of Selah's best friends in the whole world happens to live there, also. That would be her cousin, Delaney.
Thanks, those of you who continue to harass me about posting more often. (That was not a trick and you should totally read my friend, Brandi's, blog. She is hilarious. Speaking of fun blogs to read, you should also read my friend, Chelsey's, blog.)  This summer has been busy with things like swimming and camping and church activities and parties and plans for homeschooling a certain amazing kid who is 12 TODAY (I'll post more about that later- the turning 12 and the homeschooling).
In the meantime, consider following me on twitter. I will be posting regular updates regarding our trip there and would love it if you followed along!
Oh, and, simply because I can hardly stand to write anything without at least mentioning my incredible husband, here is a gratuitous picture:

Isn't he cute in his new(er) glasses? Even if he does refuse to actually smile for pictures.

A big bear hug, an 'I love you', and a 'You're doing good'

Sam (my Dad was trying to get him to smile), Pop, Nana, Selah, and Silas

My parents came to visit last week and it was truly wonderful. There is nothing quite like watching your parents enjoy your children.

I know Jeff and I have made some decisions, over the course of our marriage that my parents have questioned, though not out loud to us. We don't always agree politically, but I think we all try to laugh about it. Like the time we were visiting my parents and right before we left Jeff drew a mustache and devil ears on mom's George W. poster.

I'm sure they've wondered about some of our parenting ideas and questioned where we choose to spend our money. But, they've allowed us to make our own decisions and haven't interfered. (I don't think we've made REALLY bad decisions, by the way, but I'm sure they've kept their mouths shut on more than one occasion.)

My parents came at just the right time- a time when I am questioning how I mother....am I good enough? A time when I am questioning what I can be doing to be a better wife to Jeff......do I do enough? Am I good enough, even, for the God I fail so often? I was parched dry....and my parents came just in time to give me a good, long, refreshing drink.

When I dropped them off at the airport, I was holding back the tears. I just didn't want our time together to end!! (And it wasn't just because my mom did the dishes and the laundry.)

As my Dad was hugging me- a great big bear hug that kind of made me feel like a little girl again- he whispered in my ear, "I love you. And you and Jeff are doing a great job with those kids."

In two short sentences, my Dad managed to say exactly what a I needed to hear. He reminded me that I am enough.

Cherishing the moments and manly smelling deodorant

When I was in the sixth grade, my best friend, Becky, was killed by a car as she walked home from a piano lesson. It was really just one of those freak accidents- the sun at just the wrong angle, the car just slightly over the line, the driver blinded by the sun. And, my precious friend, Becky, with her trademark hot pink Converse high tops, was gone.

It has been a strange year for me because our oldest son, Sam, is in the sixth grade. It is difficult to think about what Becky's parents went through, losing their sixth grader. 

As I do most years around the anniversary of her death, I wrote Becky's parents a letter. I sent them a picture of our family and wrote, like I usually do, how I still think about her. How I wonder if we would still be friends. How I wonder what she would be doing, where she would be living, how many phd's she would have because she was so brilliant.

And, as I do most years, I received a letter back. 

"Your family photo is on our mantle." 

"Thank you for remembering."

"Cherish every moment."

And, for some reason, this year, it hits home. Really hits home.

I am grocery shopping with the kids. Sam and Silas inform me they need new deodorant. (I don't think Silas really needs it yet, but I suppose it's a good habit to be in, so I don't argue.) We find the deodorant aisle. 

I am in a hurry. There are places we need to go, appointments we need to be on time for.

But, the boys are very concerned with the smell of their deodorant. We continue to spend a good fifteen minutes in the deodorant aisle. They sniff every. single. brand. Every. single. scent.

"This one isn't manly enough," they muse.

"This one smells weird."

"This one smells kind of girly."

And, usually, I would rush them. I would say, "Nobody really CARES what the heck your deodorant smells like!!!! Let's move it."

But, a picture of Becky flashes. I hear her giggle and, in some really strange way, it becomes entangled with the voices of my indecisive boys.

I watch as bigger boys walk by, smirking at my oblivious boys who are much more caught up in smelling good than being cool. I wonder how long this sweet innocence will last. I marvel at how big they both are and every time I blink my eyes, they seem a bit bigger. I savor the teasing back and forth as they say things like, "I bet (insert random girls' name here) would like that smell," and, "Mom, would you like it if Dad smelled like this?" I want to take a picture, but decide I will keep this image to myself.

I take the advise of Becky's mama and I cherish this moment.