If I were to write a Christmas newsletter

2009 Family Photo, taken by the very talented Chelsey Roberts

If I had my rear in gear, I would send every one of our lovely friends and family a beautiful, creative Christmas card. Since I don't, please accept my humble apologies and these words from each of us:

Selah- My favorite thing about 2009 was that I got a new toy at the mall. In 2010, I pray that God will help me run faster. I hope I am nicer to other people.

Silas- My favorite thing about 2009 was that we got some really cool new neighbors that are my age. In 2010, I pray that God will help me read better. I hope I will be a better friend to my brother.

Sam- My favorite thing about 2009 was that I got to spend a lot more time with my family, like Bonnie and Ben, and Grandma and P-Pa, and we are getting to see Uncle James for the first time in a really long time. In 2010, I pray that God will help me become a very good skateboarder. I would like to be a better son and grandson.

Erin- My favorite thing about 2009 was entering and becoming a finalist in a songwriting competition. Although I did not win the overall award, it was so much fun to sing (at a bar after church on Sunday) in front of my friends and family. In 2010, I pray that God will help me to be content wherever He puts me.

Jeff- My favorite thing about 2009 was going to Victoria, British Columbia, for a long weekend with Erin. The scenery was beautiful and we enjoyed an awesome bed and breakfast and good wine. In 2010, I pray that God will help me to be at peace.

There is so much more we could write about. We could write about how we all learned to ski, how we bought a house in a cool neighborhood, our last minute vacation to Yellowstone with Erin's cousins, our young adults' small group that we love, our church that we love, our "adopted" Auntie Bernice and Uncle Curtis who are our Calgary family, our brain damaged chocolate lab, Abe, Erin's crazy road trip by herself with the kids over the summer, Jeff and Sam's many hikes in the Canadian Rockies, Silas and Sam starting at a new Christian school, Silas's reading improvements, Selah's continued princess status and general cuteness, Erin's girls' prayer group and their wild weekend getaway to Edmonton, and so much more.

But, what it boils down to, is that we are blessed beyond measure. Thank you for being our friends and family. The first year we lived in Calgary we had many visitors. 2009 did not produce as many and we missed it! We are a mere hour away from the beautiful Banff and have been here long enough to know the good places to sight see. Must we "sell" you on how wonderful this place is??? Seriously, it's gorgeous! AND, we live here. You have free room and board! Come. See. Us.

Love to each and every one of you.

Marshmallows and Poginas

Jeff and I had the joy of helping with children's church last Sunday. I felt the need to document the hilariousness that ensued.

The birth of Jesus was the subject of the day and a video was shown of said events. It was not a cartoon, but a remarkably well acted account of Mary and Joseph and the chaos surrounding the birth of Jesus. Perhaps it was a little too realistic for 4 and 5 year old children.

The children were quite enthralled in the film, especially when Mary began to cry out during labor. Many were quite concerned as they yelled out things like, "What's wrong with her?" "She's just having a baby- it's not that bad, right?"

And, our witty friend Roberta who was leading the class, replied, "Oh, yes. Having babies is terribly painful. You should ask your mom about that when you get home."

Back to the movie- it kept skipping between Mary giving birth and the shepherds in the field, who all had staffs. And there was a fire in the distance. Which is the only reason I can figure that one five year old piped up, "Are they roasting marshmallows? I love marshmallows! Can we have marshmallows for snack?"

The movie then skips back to Mary, who with one final anguished cry, gives birth to a slimy, bloody baby Jesus. With a bare bum. Which, of course, the children thought was hilarious. After the laughing died down, there were many questions about "that slimy baby." And, Roberta, again, deferred by telling the children they should, "Ask your mom and dad about that when you get home."

One precious little girl really made her mama proud (alright, it was my kid) when she nudged the boy next to her and announced, "That baby just came out of his mama's pogina."

"Pogina?" said the boy. "What's that?"

I was quick to enter the conversation by repeating what I had heard Roberta say, "You should ask your mom about that when you get home. Oh, look, it's the shepherds again! I think they ARE roasting marshmallows! That does sound yummy, doesn't it?"

I was satisfied that a very awkward moment had been diverted when the boy asked, once again, "Are we having marshmallows for snack?"

Parents did come and get there children after (what seemed like) a very lengthy service. I heard there were a lot of questions asked by inquisitive, observant children who took Roberta's advice to ask their parents when they got home.

The only question my children asked was if we had any marshmallows at home.

In Memory

I get to sing at a memorial service at our church next week. It is a memorial service for anyone who has had a loss over the last couple of years. While most of us are celebrating and excited about the holidays, there are others of us who dread it just as much because someone who should have been there will not be. I can not express in words what it means to me that those of us who have had miscarriages were included as those who have "lost."

I, in no way, expect my loss(es) to be considered as great as those who have lost loved ones they have known, babies they have held in their arms, or as the untimely death of a parent. Still, though, it was a loss and when others acknowledge it as such, it is precious to me.

After my most recent miscarriage last June, I was emotional (more so than usual.....I know....how can that be?!?!?!), but was able to function just fine. I have found over the last couple of weeks as the holiday approaches that I am thinking about it more. I've been thinking about how pregnant I would be right now. I've thought about the extra stocking that we'd be hanging this year. And it makes me sad. But, I'm so very thankful for the three other stockings I get to hang!

Grieving through a miscarriage is tricky sometimes. Every once in a while I find myself in tears over it and then think to myself, "I have no business being this sad when there are others who have suffered losses of a much greater magnitude." Sometimes I'm afraid that others think I have no right to be sad. Sometimes, I think I haven't been sad enough. After all, as a Christian, we believe that life begins at conception!

But, more often times, I find myself being utterly thankful for the three amazingly beautiful children the Lord has gifted to me. I plan on cherishing every moment this Christmas.